Finnegan Begin Again

When I decided to return to the workforce last June, I, wisely, turned to my very own book, Getting What You Wish For: A Short and Sweet Guide to Manifesting the Sweet Life!, for guidance in securing the “perfect” job: “Your desires must be focused, specific, and stated in such a way as to be given the answer you are looking for in order to bring about positive changes in your life.”

(I have to say, it’s terribly fun to be able to quote yourself!)

At the time, my #1 priority was finding employment that would enable me to become my sister’s primary caregiver; Colleen’s health had deteriorated to the point that she was going to need to move in with me, an eventuality that we knew was going to occur sooner or later. And now, it was time.

Keeping in mind that I needed to be specific in my request, here was my wish list for the “perfect job”:

• 100% remote, so that I could relocate Colleen to the sea-level altitude she required without having to also worry about finding a job once we got to our new home
• Sufficient income to provide for Colleen’s needs, take care of my dogs, and live the lifestyle I desired
• Time to pursue my other interests: writing, teaching, and helping others in my Cracks in Consciousness personal transformation coaching practice

That the job had to be completely remote was paramount. I was going to have to relocate for my sister’s health; she needed to live at sea-level, but I live at an altitude of 6,500 feet, which meant she couldn’t move here. So, I needed to figure out the best places to move where she could get the best medical help she required; sell my house and buy or rent a new house, get myself relocated from Colorado, and get Colleen relocated from Nevada. Having a 100% remote job would give me the time and the means to do this.

And within two months, the Universe manifested the perfect job: a Project Management contract position that was 100% remote; paid the same salary that I was making when I left the workforce at the end of 2014; required employees to work 18 months, step away for 6 months (and collect unemployment, if desired, and pursue other personal or professional pursuits), and then hire back on for another 18 months; and, once mastered, required very little time each day to manage assigned projects, which allowed me to pursue other interests. The only downside was that contractors received no benefits. But, since Colleen would be living with me, and her income would help supplement mine, this wasn’t a concern.

I interviewed for the job over the course of three days (hiring company, employer-panel situational interview, finishing up with the VP of the business unit I would be joining). I was confident that I would receive a job offer, which I did—two days after Colleen died.

I accepted the job and began work in September 2015. After all, I still needed a job, and the fact that I had to handle all of the final arrangements for Colleen made having a remote job much easier to take care of business in the coming weeks and months. Plus, many of my current circumstances and needs were still the same: sufficient income and lots of time to pursue my other interests. Perfect!

So, perfect, in fact, that I resigned two weeks ago, and Friday was my last day.

But I still believe that the Universe did, in fact, manifest the perfect job for me. I simply needed to come to understand why it was perfect for me—and why I needed to leave it.

“It will all become clear as we walk along. It is in walking a path that we come to understanding.” Margaret George

As early as October, I realized that something was wrong.

At first, I thought that I didn’t like the work because I had, quite simply, forgotten how much I disliked being the new kid on the block. It had been many years since I started a new job, and, when I left my last job, I was considered the go-to-guy with 11 years of knowledge and experience to back it up. Hubris, I admit, but there it is.

Then, I remembered something that I had written about this job in my journal when I first applied: “The job has two elements that I detest: it’s a glorified secretary’s job; you have to follow up with everyone about everything. And, you have to spend your entire day ‘herding cats.’ But I’m sure I can get used to this. After all, I need a job, and I’ve always wanted a remote job.”

Teleworking isn’t for everyone. You need to be disciplined enough to structure your time. You need excellent communication skills, self-reliance, resourcefulness, flexibility, and confidence in your abilities. If I may say so myself, I have all of these qualities in spades. And I’m certainly self-reliant and resourceful; I’ve taken care of myself and my dogs by myself for the last 12 years.

And so, I’ve teleworked often over the last 20 years, and it suits me.

But I came to understand that “telework” is not the same as “100% remote.” And while I love being able to telework, I’ve come to learn that I hate being 100% remote—especially when you live in a remote place in the first place, like I do. Where getting to a town is a 20-minute drive in the best of circumstances, and seeing your friends can be an odyssey. Plus, while it’s true that you can work from anywhere so long as you are “available” during your working hours (which, in my case, was 8:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m.), the ironical flip side is that you have to be 100% available during those hours—watching emails, responding to IMs, participating in online training—which can be challenging trying to find free Wifi and hotspots if I want to work someplace other than my own house.

But while none of this was insurmountable, one surprising (at least to me, at the time) observation became a frequent entry in my journal: I was lonely.

This was never an issue when I teleworked; I was in the office as often as I was out of the office, and so I never felt real loneliness. Admittedly, I frequently needed “by myself” time; being a practicing empath, it was important to recharge my psychic batteries regularly.

But now, I was 100% remote, and the one person I could always count on being 100% available to me wasn’t available at all anymore: my sister, Colleen.

“The components of your Authentic Self that are most important to you will help you make appropriate decisions and choices so that you don’t compromise when it comes to identifying your ideal life-work. You’ll also have a better chance at finding an emotional connection to whatever life-work you choose to do, which will allow you to thrive.” From my book, Will Work to Feed Dogs: Seven Steps to Identifying Meaningful Life-Work Now!

The Universe manifested exactly what I wished for: the perfect job. But it finally dawned on me why it was perfect: not because it was remote or because it paid me a good salary or was pretty easy to manage during the day. Rather, it was perfect for me because of what it taught me about myself. And the most important lesson was that I needed to accept my Authentic Self and what I needed and wanted in order to find that emotional connection.

This is how the Universe works: the answer we receive might not be the answer we think we’re looking for. So, it’s our job to glean from it what the answer truly means for us and why the answer is, in fact, perfect after all.

And once we discover the true meaning of the answer, it’s time to take the next step along that path to understanding.

Which, in my case, means that tomorrow I begin my new job. And what might that be?

Tune it next week to find out the surprising (at least to me) result!

And, as always, remember this: It’s NEVER too late to be what you might have been!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!