The Gift That Keeps On Giving

#ThoughtHealing Quote for the Week: “Both abundance and lack exist simultaneously in our lives, as parallel realities. It is always our conscious choice which secret garden we will tend… when we choose not to focus on what is missing from our lives but are grateful for the abundance that’s present — love, health, family, friends, work, the joys of nature and personal pursuits that bring us pleasure — the wasteland of illusion falls away and we experience Heaven on earth.” Sarah Ban Breathnach

Many years ago, I set out to plan a small but thoughtfully laid out garden in the front of my house. As you know, I’m a project manager by profession, so I approached this project in the same way as I tackled a multi-million dollar, multi-year technology infusion project: I evaluated my “current state” (the patch of brown waiting to be brought to life), I envisioned my “future state” (the beautifully crafted blooms that would flower year after year), and, most importantly, I developed my game plan for achieving my final solution that would no doubt one day be featured in Better Homes and Gardens (Western States edition).

I began by researching the best plants to include in my garden. I learned how to amend the soil; how to lay out everything in such a way as to take advantage of sunlight, runoff, and wind; and how to ensure that there would be adequate space between the plants to allow each one to spread out and up (all the while being sure not to plant anything on the dragon’s back, at least from a flowering feng shui perspective).

And so I excitedly bought all of my exhaustively researched plants, and I lovingly and thoughtfully placed each one according to the landscape blueprint I had equally lovingly and thoughtfully drawn up, every detail considered, every place on the dragon’s back plotted out. Now, all I had to do was sit back and marvel as my plans—and my plants—bore fruit and blossomed.

Even the most novice of gardeners knows that these things take time. There is an ebb and flow to the seasons; things grow and mature in their own time. Which means that, at least for the first couple of seasons, the garden might look a bit sparse. But, in time, everything will fill in exactly as planned.

As I said, I’m a planner, and a good one. I was confident that I had taken everything into account when I planned my project. And so I was willing to be patient and let things unfold as they were meant to.

Only, as it turned out, I had overlooked one factor that would ultimately spell disaster.

And that one factor was my husband.

Patience was not in his vocabulary. He thought the garden looked “too sparse,” and he was not willing to wait for it to fill in. He wanted what he wanted now (which, as it turned out, was his approach to pretty much everything, but that’s another story). So one day, unbeknownst to me (and while I was at work), he stopped by the local nursery and, explained this dire predicament to one of the salespeople. He then came home with what he was told would be the perfect addition to the garden, one that would fill in those artfully planned empty spaces quickly.

Which turned out to be Kentucky Bluegrass seed.

He happily spread that pernicious offender EVERYWHERE in my artfully planned garden. A former minor league baseball player with a wicked throwing arm, he applied himself with the precision of an outfielder gunning down the runner racing to steal home from third base. Nothing was left to chance—and no empty space was left untilled and unseeded.

How proud he was to show me the fruits of his labor when I got home. Not the brightest bulb, he didn’t realize for some time that I wasn’t exactly pleased with his effort. And so, for once, he decided to be patient and assured me that I would be happy with the results if I would just give it “a little time.”

(In truth, he was patiently waiting to tell me, “I told you so.”)

Sure enough, we did not have long to wait. The very next spring, my garden began to take shape. At least, I think it did. I wasn’t sure. I couldn’t see my little buds pushing up to sunlight because they were swallowed up by the JUNGLE of Kentucky Bluegrass that seemed to spring forth overnight.

And year after year, while some of my plants failed, and others seemed to thrive, I could always count on one thing that would never fail and would always thrive in my garden: That (insert various expletives here) Kentucky Bluegrass.

In time, I decided to once and for all eradicate my garden of all pernicious weeds, failures, and seasonal flops. I also eradicated my husband. (Told you so.)

But the one thing I’ve never been able to rid my garden of is that lousy bluegrass. Which in the spirit of the holidays, I came to think of as The Gift That Keeps On Giving.

Every spring, when I see that bluegrass come to life (actually, it’s really more like the zombie plant in my garden because nothing can kill it and it’s the only thing that seems to stay green year-round), I’m reminded of my life BKB and AGKH: Before Kentucky Bluegrass and After Garden-Killing Husband. My life—like my thoughtfully and carefully planned garden—looks nothing like the landscape blueprint I thought my life would be those many years ago.

Marcel Proust said, “Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.”

And while I curse that bluegrass every spring, I also make a conscious choice to think of it as the best possible Gift That Keeps On Giving that I’ve ever received. It reminds me of many things: of how things can change when we least expect it; how our best laid plans can go awry; how what might at first seem to be the worst thing that could happen might, in time, turn out to be one of the best things.

So, as this year comes to an end, and you open your gifts this week, what gifts have you received that will keep on giving—and what gifts can YOU give to others so that you, too, will be a charming gardener?

Think about it!

And, as always, remember this: It’s never too late to be what you might have been!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Inside (Looking) Out

#ThoughtHealing Quote for the Week: “You never really know a man until you understand things from his point of view, until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.” Harper Lee, “To Kill A Mockingbird”

I got a copy of my sister’s death certificate yesterday. Near the bottom, in box 25, “Immediate Cause,” there was space for up to four causes of death, preceded by this explanation: “Conditions if any which gave rise to immediate cause stating the underlying cause last.” Unfortunately, although not surprisingly, all four lines had an entry.

The first three were Cardiopulmonary Arrest, Acute Respiratory Failure, Severe Pulmonary Hypertension. No surprises here; Colleen had been diagnosed with Emphysema many years ago, and Severe Pulmonary Hypertension is often a result of this condition.

Then I noticed the last one, the one that the death certificate described as the underlying cause: Obesity-hypoventilation Syndrome. And I thought, “So, there it is, Colleen, you were right. Once again, it all comes down to your weight.”

Anne Lamott said, “Everyone is walking around as an advertisement for who he or she is.”

This bothers me. I want to argue with it, but I can’t. My own experience, and more importantly, that of my family, won’t allow me to.

Colleen used to joke about how people perceived her. You see, not only was she obese, she also had just two teeth. She’d say, “I know what people are thinking when they look at me: backwoods hillbilly who married her first cousin.” She also joked about her former cocaine use. She used to say, “It figures—everyone else who used cocaine looked like swizzle sticks, but what happened to me? I was probably the only overweight cocaine user on the planet.” (I would try to comfort her by pointing out that I was probably the only person who owned overweight GSDs in Colorado. Somehow, I don’t think this took much of the sting—or the stigma—away.)

When my oldest sister (now also passed) was in the middle of job hunting, she asked me to help her write her resume, which was very impressive, and cover letter. Job hunting is an experience that I know from recent personal experience is difficult in the best of circumstances.

As we were finishing up, she asked me this question: “Should I mention something about how I look in my cover letter?” This puzzled me. We all know the unwritten rules of writing resumes when you are “of a certain age”: never mention your age, when you graduated from college, your martial status, how many children you have—all of these can be off-putting to a hiring manager. But I hadn’t even thought about this before, and so I asked her why.

“Because whenever I get an actual face-to-face interview,” she replied matter of factly, “They take one look at me and I know I won’t get the job, no matter how qualified I am. So maybe I could mention that, despite my physical appearance, I’m capable, loyal, and dependable. And I’m healthy, no matter what they might think about how I look.”

You see, my sister was all of these things and more: capable, loyal, dependable, brilliant, beautiful—and she weighed over 300 pounds.

As it turned out, she didn’t include this in her cover letter, but she also didn’t get a face-to-face interview, so perhaps it would have been a moot point.

But I don’t think so. In fact, I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t have gotten the job.

Everyone has heard this well-worn statement by George Orwell (and its countless renderings for every condition under the sun), “I'm fat, but I'm thin inside... there's a thin man inside every fat man.”

I never asked either of my sisters whether they had thin alter egos. Whether it bothered them that what they were on the inside—kind, compassionate, gentle, forgiving—didn’t match what people chose to see on the outside. That, in fact, most people dismissed them entirely, or, even more reprehensible but still noticeable, that people were repelled by them.

I mean, think about it: you’re on a plane getting ready to depart. There’s an empty seat next to you—and a very large person coming down the aisle. Quick—what’s your first thought? “Please, oh please, don’t sit here.” It’s a common reaction. I’d be lying if I said I never had that thought myself.

But I’d also be lying if I didn’t point out how obvious our “don’t sit here” aversion is to the very large person coming down the aisle.

I know—because, like my sisters, I used to be one of those very large people, too.

“There are things visible and invisible,” Rumer Godden said.

It’s so easy to size someone up just by looking at what is visible—their size, their age, their gender, their height, the color of their hair. And maybe, for some, the outside matches the inside, their thin person has escaped and is now visible to the world.

But I suspect that, for most of us, there is something invisible inside each of us that has not yet been allowed to be seen. And what might it take for us to look past the visible in order to catch even a glimpse of what might be just below the surface, but so much more real.

Think about it!

And, as always, remember this: It’s never too late to be what you might have been!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Anticipation Is A Double-Edged Sword

#ThoughtHealing Quote for the Week: “Expecting is the greatest impediment to living. In anticipation of tomorrow, it loses today.” Seneca

At this time of year, people spend a lot of time focusing on the future. What resolutions should I make for the coming year? What changes do I need to make in my health care enrollment for next year? How much money will I owe, or might I get back, when I file my taxes next year? What might the new year bring me? What might Santa bring me?

I certainly understand this “what’s next?” perspective.

Right now, I, too, am looking at several possibilities that might or will come to pass in the next several months.

It started when one of my psychic advisers told me that I would be facing a number of “significant crossroads” in the first three months of 2016.

Next, my health insurance expired yesterday, so I’m researching health exchanges to find affordable (I use this term skeptically) options for 2016.

I’m on a deposit list for a new GSD puppy that, with luck and a successful breeding, will be born sometime in February. And I’ve been on this list for over a year, so talk about anticipation!

I have my annual trip to Hawaii coming up at the end of January, so it’s time to finish making my remaining travel arrangements. (I don’t know about you, but I so miss the days when I could just call my father, who lived in Hawaii, tell him what time to pick me up at the airport, and board the next flight leaving for Oahu! Twenty-one day advance purchase? I remember when all you needed was about 21 minutes.)

Since I lived on a combination of unemployment benefits and taxable withdrawals from my IRA for most of this year, I’ve already run my taxes for 2016 to see how much I’m going to owe the IRS come April.

And, last but not least, I have been watching my email like a hawk since yesterday in anticipation of an announcement (no details can be shared right now) that will make a significant difference in how I live my life in the coming year.

So to say that, for today, I’m living in the future much more than in the present moment would be an understatement. So to what degree am I squandering the treasures of this moment in exchange for what may or may not occur in the future?

Now, I’m the first to admit that anticipation is a double-edged sword.

Samuel Smiles said, “An intense anticipation itself transforms possibility into reality; our desires being often but precursors of the things which we are capable of performing.”

This makes sense to me. After all, many of the things on the horizon for me are all about what I believe I am capable of, and I’m looking forward to the possibility of a new reality.

And let’s not forget one of the books I published this year, “Getting What You Wish For: A Short and Sweet Guide to Manifesting the Sweet Life”; this book focuses on how to activate the Law of Attraction and place into vibrational escrow the things you want to have, do, or be in your life. Caroline Kepnes described this best when she said, “And I will never again underestimate the power of anticipation. There is no better boost in the present than an invitation into the future.”

And so I precariously balance on that double-edge sword of anticipation and expectation: trying to be conscious of the blessings of the moment so that I don’t squander today while, at the same time, inviting a future that will manifest my desires.

(Not to mention, anticipating the joy of puppy kisses!)

Think about it!

And, as always, remember this: It’s never too late to be what you might have been!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

3x5 Full of Gratitude

#ThoughtHealing Quote for the Week: “Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings.” William Arthur Ward

I don’t know about you, but among the many things I’m grateful for are tools. Duct tape and an electric screwdriver are a homeowner’s best friend. A set of diamond drill bits are among this girl’s best friends. And, don’t even get me started on how much I love my Sawzall—no overgrown tree on my property is safe!

So whenever I start something new—a new job, a new book, a new DIY project—I look for the appropriate tools that will help me succeed.

We all know the saying, “Use the right tool for the right job.” Thomas Carlyle even went so far as to declare, “Man is a tool-using animal. Without tools, he is nothing. With tools, he is all.”

Look out Home Depot, here I come!

When I embarked on my sobriety journey, I approached this “project” in the same way: I looked for the tools I could use that would help me get sober and, more importantly, stay sober. Because, after all, what’s the point of building a barn only to have it fall down (or get locked in—see my previous blog about that debacle) because I used the wrong tools?

One of the most effective tools in the sobriety toolkit that I was handed was the Gratitude List.

“The greatest enemies of us alcoholics are resentment, jealousy, envy, frustration, and fear. When [these feelings] come, stop and count your blessings.” The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

A few weeks ago, I shared with you that, when I first got sober, these “greatest enemies” were the only feelings I recognized. So I knew right away that I would need a really powerful tool in my spiritual toolkit if I was going to have any hope at getting and staying sober. And that tool was the Gratitude List.

But exactly why is a Gratitude List so important?

Because when you are in the midst of emotionally paralyzing, negative feelings, you literally can’t think clearly. On the other hand, when you are in the midst of gratitude, you literally can’t conceive of negative emotions, let alone feel them. Or, as M.J. Ryan succinctly put it, “Whenever we are appreciative, we are filled with a sense of well-being and swept up by the feeling of joy.”

Now, because negative feelings can cloud clear thinking, recovering alcoholics are encouraged (actually, my AA sponsor DEMANDED) that we take the time to actually write down what we were most grateful for on a 3x5 card and keep the card with us at all times. That way, whenever the negative thoughts and emotions threatened our serenity or our sobriety, we could pull out that little card, read over everything we had written down, and remind ourselves of the many blessings we did have as a result of just not taking that one drink again.

And so I dutifully wrote down the things I was grateful for, and I kept my 3x5 index card always at the ready—and believe me, I pulled that little lifesaving tool out of my spiritual toolkit dozens of times in the first year of my sobriety, and lots of time since then.

Gratitude shifts your focus from what your life lacks to the abundance that is already present. In addition, behavioral and psychological research has shown that giving thanks makes people happier and more resilient, strengthens relationships, improves health, and reduces stress.

Wow—all that from one little 3x5 card? What’s not to be grateful for?

William A. Ward said, “God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say ‘thank you?’”

On this Thanksgiving, do you think about what you are thankful for only on this one day? Or, does your practice of gratitude extend beyond a single day? And how might practicing gratitude and giving thanks for everything transform your “common days into thanksgivings” each and every day?

Think about it!

And, as always, remember this: It’s never too late to be what you might have been!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Paris (Really) Is Burning

#ThoughtHealing Quote for the Week: “All we are saying is give peace a chance.” John Lennon

Over the last couple of weeks, we’ve talked about living an examined life—looking at our motivations, our feelings, our thoughts, and our beliefs in order to see what is at the heart of our true selves.

Given the tragedy in Paris, and throughout the world, over the last few days, this exercise takes on a very personal poignancy for me—and, perhaps, for some of you as well.

I’ve shared with you that I live a life of self-examination on a daily basis. That examination takes many forms, but it does not include examining what’s going on in the world. I don’t read the news. I don’t watch the news. I don’t listen to the news.

So if something is going on in the world, I usually hear about it on Facebook.

I don’t follow a lot of people on Facebook, and even fewer follow me. I have a handful of family and friends who have access to my personal page, and I have a public business page for my Cracks in Consciousness life coaching practice.

That said, given how few people and pages I actually do follow, I was dismayed (shocked? saddened?) by the number of people who posted these sentiments in response to the Paris catastrophe: “It’s time we blow up those F%%%%g A#####s!” “When are we’re going to stop putting up with this and just go after those B******s with guns blazing?”

Because I do not believe in self-delusion (or in deluding you, my readers), I have to admit that my initial, nearly unconscious reaction to these passionate exhortations was, “Amen, sisters and brothers!” I understand this reaction and why some people hold to this truth.

However, I then had a more conscious reaction to what I was reading. I thought, “But who exactly are we going to go after and blow up? A few zealots? A terrorist cell? A town? A country?”

I have no answers to these question nor can I offer solutions to the violence in this world. Solutions can only come from understanding, and I don’t understand what would compel someone to take the life of another human being in cold blood.

But here is something I do understand.

Yesterday was my sister’s 58th birthday. Or, rather, I should say, it would have been her 58th birthday. She passed away in September—on 9/11, to be exact. It is both heartbreaking and ironic to think that the anniversary of her passing—one of the gentlest, kindest souls ever to be on Earth—is now shared with the anniversary of one of the most horrible, violent events in America’s brief history.

Colleen absolutely loved, adored, and was passionate about all things Disney. To her, it was, without question, the happiest place on Earth.

In another irony, today is the 50th anniversary of the announcement of Walt Disney’s plans to build Walt Disney World in central Florida.

Colleen and I went to Walt Disney World several years ago while she was still fairly mobile and able to travel with only minor assistance. Despite the 95-degree weather and crushing humidity, we had a great time while we were there.

We planned a return trip for next month. However, over the last several months, it had become painfully obvious that Colleen’s health would no longer allow her to travel.

Unfortunately, Walt Disney died in 1966 before construction began on his Florida project. But his dream of creating happiness on Earth has never died, nor will my happy memories of the time I spent with my sister.

So what does any of this have to do with Paris?

In this excerpt from “Desiderata,” Max Erhmann said it best:

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

For me, it is this: Surely we can take this lesson to ourselves, and make peace and compassion the happiest place on earth.

(Seeing Everything With) Eyes Wide Shut

#ThoughtHealing #MotivationMonday Quote for the Week: “The truth of a thing is the feel of it, not the think of it.” Stanley Kubrick

Last week, we talked about the value of self-examination, and how knowledge of oneself can be the first step towards wisdom and a more satisfying life in which you are true to yourself.

So now, let’s assume that you’ve taken that first step towards “true-ness”: you’ve examined yourself and you now have a wealth of information at your fingertips.

Which begs the question, “Now what?”

I have a tendency to overthink things. Okay, my family and friends would object to the “tendency” part—they’d cut right to it and state emphatically that I overthink EVERYTHING.

Maybe it’s genetic. After all, my late sister, when I would tell her about how I was struggling with making a decision, would reply, “Well, don’t look at me for advice. You know how this family is. It can take me a day just to decide to go the bathroom.” (Granted, I’ve cleaned up this potty humor a bit; after all, I wouldn’t like to speak ill of the dead—although she’d be the first to laugh about this!)

On the other hand, maybe it’s part of the whole “nature versus nurture” debate. I am, by nature (and as a result, by profession), a planner and process engineer. I make a living by thinking about how things are done now and how they can be improved, streamlined, or eliminated (no potty pun intended here, either).

On the other hand, there wasn’t an abundance of nurturing going on in my family when I was growing up, so I can’t really speak to what I have no frame of reference for. But I do know that a lack of nurturing can result in the need to analyze everything in order to avoid making mistakes and to feel safe in one’s environment.

Or, at least, that’s how it works for me.

So, when I read something like, “the truth of a thing is the feel of it, not the think of it,” I have to think about this. Because knowing how I feel about things isn’t in my nature, either.

When I was in the outpatient facility to treat my alcoholism, one of the things we had to do was share how we were feeling. Don’t get me started about how much I hated, loathed, and abominated that little exercise—how’s that for sharing my feelings? One of the counselors warned me that sharing how angry and resentful I was would not suffice. Apparently, everyone had figured out pretty quickly that I only had these two feelings most of the time.

But I didn’t know any other touchy, feely words. And apparently, neither did most of the others in my recovery group. After all, many of us drank to numb our constant feelings of anger and resentment.

But the counselor was prepared for this, and handed around a list of feelings that we could choose from. Imagine my surprise to see just how many feelings I could have.

And I’ve used this exercise ever since, particularly when I’m feeling overwhelmed by my overthinking.

So, how might you apply the “feeling truth of a thing” to everything you’ve learned about yourself in the course of your daily self-examination?

First and foremost, it can act as a neutralizer of sorts, a way to silence the inner critic. I don’t know about you, but, for me, not only can I overthink, but I can be equally overcritical of what I discover about myself along the way. Which also means that I can either make the wrong decision or be too afraid to make any decision.

Take overthinking as an example. This is one of my “think of a thing” truths. I know this to be true of me.

But how do I feel about this truth?

Well, to tell the truth, I’m feel okay about it (okay, let me get out my list of feelings words to see if I can be more specific). I feel A-OK, comfortable, satisfied, swell, hunky-dory, all right, pleased, and snug as a bug in a rug with it (thank you, thesaurus.com!). And, yes, sometimes I can suffer from analysis paralysis. However, this natural talent of mine has also made me very good at my job.

Judy Carter said, “That day, I learned overthinking gets in the way of our natural talents. We have to turn off the critical, plotting, safety mind and tap into our innate abilities. We can do more than we think we can.

Don’t you love the irony of this statement? Overthinking can in fact get in the way of recognizing that we can do more than we think we can.

Thinking about what you are discovering about yourself as you journey through life, can you tell the difference between the think of a thing and the feel of a thing? Is your self-knowledge providing you with limitless opportunities? Or is the think of a thing limiting what you believe you can do?

Think about it!

And, as always, remember this: It’s never too late to be what you might have been!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Self Interest

#ThoughtHealing #MotivationMonday Quote for the Week: “This above all: to thine own self be true. Hamlet Act 1, scene 3, 78–82

“To thine own self be true” is Polonius's last piece of advice to his son Laertes, who is about to head off to Paris for his gentleman's education (and who, by the way, can’t wait to get away from the old man, if for no other reason than to avoid being preached to with such pithy platitudes).

By “true” Polonius means “loyal to your own best interests.” Take care of yourself first, he counsels, and that way you'll be in a position to take care of others.

I think Polonius is onto something here.

I have learned that owning what is important to me, acknowledging my needs and wants DESPITE WHAT ANYONE ELSE THINKS is essential. Which is why helping others learn how to know themselves and what is most important to them is a central theme in all of my books.

In my book, Will Work to Feed Dogs, the focus is on taking stock—identifying your needs and wants, your values, your natural abilities, your passions and interests, and your skills—in order to align your present circumstances with what matters most to you. When you gain clarity about what is in your best and highest interest, you will be able to make more meaningful choices and take consistent action.

In Getting What You Wish For, I show you how important it is to learn to articulate exactly what you want to have, be, or do in your life in order to activate the Law of Attraction and ensure that what you manifest is, indeed, what you wish for.

The focus of I’ve Been Down Here Before, But This Time I Know The Way Out is on leaving behind all of the thoughts, beliefs, assumptions, emotions, and expectations that no longer serve you.

And in Doing the Thing You Think You Cannot Do, I show you how easy it is to change how you might react to the life-changing events that make up your life simply by being willing to face them, embrace them, and go confidently through them. And, once you’ve had the experience of “doing the thing you think you cannot do,” you can face anything—and survive it.

We’ve all heard of Socrates’ bold dictum, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” I’m not sure I would go so far as to say that. But, for me, I can’t imagine living an unexamined life. As a recovering alcoholic, the key components of my 27 years of sobriety have always been being honest with myself; acknowledging my feelings (especially resentment, which can drive me to drink if I’m not ever vigilant); recognizing the motivations behind my actions; and taking responsibility for those actions. None of which would have been possible if I hadn’t taken the time examine my life.

Steven Pressfield in his iconic The War of Art, said, “It’s one thing to lie to ourselves. It’s another to believe it.” I have, on more than one occasion, told myself—and others—some little white lies and not a few whoppers. But I can’t afford the luxury of believing those lies because I believe that doing so will jeopardize my continued sobriety and peace of mind.

Are you true to yourself? Do you even know what that looks like? Do you take the time to examine your life?

Think about it!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Ghost Stories

#ThoughtHealing Quote For The Week: “If you don’t want to be scared, stop telling yourself ghost stories.” Sheri Holman, “Witches on the Road Tonight”

When you head out on the road of life each day, how do you plan your route? Do you look for monsters lurking under the bed and things that go bump in the night? Or do you prefer the happy ending, cup-not-just-half-full-but-overflowing approach to life?

Our limiting thoughts and beliefs are like the ghost stories we tell ourselves. Limiting beliefs serve as filters of our reality; when we get a limiting belief, our life loses its richness because we are not able to perceive it correctly. When our ghost stories become our reality, fear often leaves us feeling emotionally paralyzed. We are unable to act quickly or decisively or, in some cases, even think clearly.

However, once we can identify anything that might be holding us back, we can always transform the limiting beliefs of our ghost stories into more empowering beliefs that can help us keep moving toward our goals, even if roadblocks arise on our path.

The most important thing to remember is that you can choose what you want to tell yourself: the scary ghost stories or the happy ending stories. You can either focus on what you don’t have, the obstacles you face, the risks you have to take. Or, you can focus on your desires. Focus on negative thoughts, and this will manifest negatively in your life: your health might suffer, your peace of mind will be compromised, or you will exist in a constant state of stress. Focus on pleasant thoughts, and your existence will be pleasant.

Dr. Michael Smith said, “Every utterance from our mouth is a prayer.”

Are your words fraught with things that go bump in the night? Or are your utterances light and airy, like prayers?

Think about it!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

The Three Most Important Words in Personal Transformation

#ThoughtHealing Quote for the Week: “It’s not only moving that creates new starting points. Sometimes all it takes is a subtle shift in perspective, an opening of the mind, an intentional pause and reset, or a new route to start to see new options and new possibilities.” Kristin Armstrong

We all know that the three most important words in real estate are location, location, location. In my experience as a personal transformation coach, I have learned that when we decide to embark on radically redesigning ourselves and our place in the world, the three most important words are perception, perception, perception. And why? Because you can change the quality of your life by changing the context in which you see your circumstances.

Change your perception, change your life. It’s that simple.

So, how might subtle shifts in perspective allow you to transform your life?

In my Personal Transformation coaching practice, one of the things I help people with is learning how to successfully cope with the events that make up their lives. Everything from the unforeseen, like divorce, loss of a job, or terminal illness, to the inevitable, like death and, for most of us, taxes.

And, the most important component of successfully coping with any life event is learning how to change your perception of the event. No matter what happens, you can choose how to perceive the events that make up your life. And it is the power of choice that makes life endurable, worthwhile, joyful, just plain manageable – or spectacular.

And here’s why I know this to be true.

From 2002 to 2012, I shared my life with the four-legged love of my life, a Czechoslovakian Shepherd named Kona. He meant everything to me, and I couldn’t imagine my life without him.

However, in 2006, Kona was diagnosed with a life-threatening medical condition. Life expectancy rates for dogs with Kona’s condition were bleak at best; one vet told me that the longest any of his patients lived after the diagnosis was three weeks. He warned me that the only chance Kona had of surviving at all was to keep him quiet, avoiding exercise and excitement. He even walked me through what to do if Kona had a sudden heart attack while we’re out walking or just playing outside, which was apparently how most of the dogs with this condition died.

To say I was devastated doesn’t come close to describing how I felt. Needless to say, I barely heard a word that the vet was telling me, and I cried for two days.

And then I decided to change how I would perceive this awful, unthinkable news.

I realized I had a choice. I could either choose to let it negatively impact every remaining moment I had with Kona – I could lock him in the house, never take him for a walk again, never let him chase birds or rabbits, never leave him alone for a single moment “just in case.” 

Or, I could choose to see this as a blessing and be grateful for every moment I was going to have with him. We could go on as we did before, chasing lots of rabbits (knowing he could never catch them, thank heavens!), taking long walks – aware of the possible consequences but living our lives to the fullest. And we did, not just for three short weeks but, miraculously, for four more spectacular years!

Which is not to say that I didn’t have to face my fears and deal with Kona’s condition realistically for however much time we had left together.

But once I changed my perception of this event, I found that I was able to think about the unthinkable: going on with my life without Kona in my life.

Deanne Repich said, “Genuine control is not about predicting the future—my grade, my income, my relationships, or a thousand other things. It’s knowing that whatever happens, I can choose how to perceive and react to life’s events.”

If there is one thought that I want you to leave here with today, it’s this: The most important thing to keep in mind is that perception is a matter of choice. You have a choice. You can either approach your the events that make up your life with dread, fear, negativism, or apprehension. Or, you can see those events as an opportunity to learn from the experience without being emotionally crushed by the knowledge.

Deanne Repich also said this, “Genuine control does not mean controlling all of life’s events. It means interpreting life’s events in a way that promotes my growth, happiness, and well-being.”

You have a choice every day regarding the perceptions you will embrace for that day. You cannot change the inevitable, the unexpected, or the unthinkable. But you CAN change how you approach and deal with anything that might throw you off course. And I promise you that you will survive and thrive!

Think about it!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Kick-The-Bucket List

#ThoughtHealing Quote for the Week: “At my age of 63, there are a lot of things that are no longer likely or possible. I’ll probably never go up Mt. Kilimanjaro or run another marathon. I won’t spend a winter crewing on boats in the Caribbean. Won’t learn to play the piano. Might learn another language, although that’s a long shot. But I’ll tell you one thing that is possible. You can walk across Scotland and put your feet in the sea.” David Brown, excerpted from “Sea to sea: a hillwalking ‘challenge’ across Scotland,” Washington Post Sunday, October 11, 2015

My first experience with recognizing that something was no longer likely or possible “at my age” was during a hike on the Aiea Loop Trail in the Keaiwa Heiau State Park on the island of Oahu. 

This was my first time trying this hike, and since I was alone, I did my homework first about safety for solitary hikers. I was encouraged, plus the idea of this being a loop meant that I would probably not get lost since, sooner or later, I’d end up back where I started from.

Imagine my surprise when I discovered that it was not, strictly speaking, a “loop.” You begin in one area and end in another. Of course, I didn’t realize this until I was finished—and, by that time, the hike had nearly finished me off.

The first portion was nice (read, “How easy-peasy, so glad I decided to do this”), but the middle had lots of mud and/or water puddles that had to be negotiated (read, “jumped over or waded through”), and the last portion was more enclosed (read, “more isolated and scary than I expected”) by a narrower trail and lower trees. Plus, there were little to no benches or just a place to pull over to take a break; the trail was not well-marked other than the well-worn main trail; and there were a lot of side trails that you could easily (the only easy thing about this) wander off on, never to be heard from again. Oh, and by the way, it’s not a bad idea to be aware of the sheer drops here and there.

Did I mention that I believed I had done my homework beforehand?

About 90 minutes into the hike, I came across a downed tree that was completely blocking the trail. I had no choice but to climb over it. Which is what brings me to the moment when I realized that something that used to be easy for me had, unexpectedly, become near to impossible: I barely had the strength to hoist myself up and over, and, once over, I became seriously concerned that I wouldn’t have the strength to finish the hike.

Of course, since I’m writing this now, you know that this story had a happy ending. I did manage to finish, especially lifted in spirit when a young mother and her very young son lapped me sooner after the tree (I might not have had much strength left, but for heavens sake, I did have my pride!).

At the time, I remember being very discouraged by the knowledge that hiking—at least, this kind of hiking—might no longer be possible for me. And, for a time, I was discouraged about my life in general. After all, baring a miracle, I realized that, in all likelihood, I now had less time in front of me than behind me.

But then I decided I had a choice. I could either close the book on my bucket list OR I could simply change the entries. And I have a lot (although winter crewing on boats in the Caribbean has never been, nor will it ever be, on my bucket list).

So, what’s on your bucket list? Are you constrained by the  things that are no longer possible? Or are you energized and motivated by all this IS still possible for you?

Think about it!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Out of Control, Out of Mind

This week's #ThoughtHealing inspiration comes from a post by Dr. Amy Johnson who described far better than I ever could how important it is to learn to let go. Please check out this insightful #MondayMotivation post: http://tinybuddha.com/blog/let-go-of-control-how-to-learn-the-art-of-surrender/

I’m a black-or-white, everything-tied-up-in-a-neat-bow-that-I-tied kinda gal. The outside-of-my-control gray area is the quintessential definition of a bad neighborhood for me: don’t go in alone and never go in after dark.

Margaret Roach, in "And I Shall Have Some Peace There," described this state of mind best when she said, “Out of control sent me out of my mind.” I am without a doubt out of my mind right now, wandering alone in the dark, bad neighborhood of the gray area.

In the last three weeks, my sister unexpectedly passed away, I started a new job and have yet been able to log into my new company’s website (somedays I hate, loathe, and abominate technology), and the mother of the puppies that I have had a deposit on for months finally got pregnant only to miscarry the entire litter 30 days into the pregnancy.

And while I know that none of these events are within my control, it doesn’t make me feel any better.

One thing that Dr. Johnson said that I disagree slightly with is this: "Sometimes it’s as easy as noticing that you’re in control mode and choosing to let go—consciously and deliberately shifting into surrender energy."

Control freaks like me are typically ALWAYS in control mode, so recognizing something that is simply the way we operate on a daily basis isn’t what I would blithely describe as “easy.”

And it’s not really that I’m afraid of surrendering. Twenty-eight years ago, when I finally realized that I had a drinking problem, I surrendered my need to control everything around me out of fear and turned my losing battle against alcohol over to a Higher Power. Still sober after all these years.

But I have other fears: fear of looking stupid, fear of not being perfect at my new job, fear of not being able to replenish my meager savings account no matter how hard I try to economize. Fear of learning to live without my sister in my life. Fear of letting go and, this time, of not finding my way out of the dark neighborhood by myself.

But Dr. Johnson also said this, which I vehemently agree with: “Find out whose business you’re in. Your business is the realm of things that you can directly influence. Are you there? Or are you in someone else’s business? When we’re trying to control things outside of our own business, it’s not going to go well.”

Now you’re in my wheelhouse.

My professional background is in Business Process Re-engineering and Organizational Change Management. I have over 20 years’ experience in helping companies fundamentally rethink how they do their work in order to identify and eliminate non-value-add activities. An approach that I use most often is the concept of “sphere of control versus sphere of influence.” This concept posits that the things we're worried about or that we complain about fall into three domains: things we have control over, things we can influence, and things that are outside of our control and influence. Companies that exhibit the most process inefficiencies typically are the ones that spend far too much time mucking around in the dark neighborhoods over which they have little or no control.

So how might I apply what I’ve learned in my professional life to my seemingly adrift out-of-control personal life right now?

Well, it wasn’t easy, but I finally realized that I have no control over the fact that my sister passed away, that my new company still hasn’t sent me the token I need to log on, and the puppy that I had already named won’t be coming home at Christmas after all.

Instead, I can choose be grateful for the time I did have with my sister. I can choose to continue to email the company about the missing token (all the while letting them know that I am ready to log in the moment they resolve these issues at THEIR end). And I can choose to either get my deposit back or transfer my deposit to another upcoming litter from the same breeder (which I did).

The bottom line is this: we have a finite amount of energy. The key is to use our energy where it counts. The more we focus on what's in our control, the more effective we'll feel. The happier we'll be.

Ernie Zelinksi said, “Practically everything in your life is a matter of choice.”

My sister and I used to laugh about the fact that, given the choice, we tended to choose the hard way over the easy way, to overthink everything.

My choice now is to try to live within my sphere of control and to learn to let go of the rest.

You, too, have a choice every day regarding how you approach your day. You cannot change the inevitable, the unexpected, or the unthinkable. But you CAN change how you approach and deal with anything that might throw you off course.

Think about it!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Words To Live By

 #ThoughtHealing Quote For The Week: “‘Someday’ is a disease that takes your dreams to the grave with you. If it’s important to you and you want to do it ‘eventually,’ just do it and correct your course along the way. Tom Ferriss, The Four-Hour Workweek

I admire people who live their lives by the “Just Do It” Nike credo. And, apparently, Mr. Ferriss counts himself among that elite few, happily exhorting the rest of us to embrace this motto. We all know people like this: the ones who successfully, and seemingly with little effort, make a major change in their lives, like quitting smoking, losing weight, or even walking away from their “Sure Thing” job in order to seek their passion in life. These people are the high-wire acts in the circus of life, the ones who courageously go out on a limb and then willingly saw themselves off.

I have a different philosophy, which I think of as the anti-Nike approach to life: “Just Don’t Do It.” Born out of fear, a mean lazy streak, and the immortal words of Louisa May Alcott who said, “Let us be elegant or die,” I have no problem with not doing something—especially if there is a chance that I do it wrong or, heaven forbid, risk looking stupid.

Or, maybe it’s just that I’m more of a Canon “Image Is Everything” kinda gal.

One of Canon’s most successful ad campaigns, the “Image Is Everything” commercial featuring Andre Agassi, was all about style over substance. “Overnight,” Agassi wrote in his autobiography, Open, “the slogan became synonymous with me. Sportswriters likened this slogan to my inner nature, my essential being. They said it’s my philosophy, my religion, and they predicted it would be my epitaph.”

And could you blame them?

In the early years of his male-pattern baldness, a rabidly narcissistic Agassi took to wearing a flamboyantly high-maintenance weave. As if it wasn't enough that the hair that made him famous was fake, Agassi admits that it was a crappy fake, too: At the 1990 French Open, Agassi's conditioner caused his weave to fall apart, forcing his brother to bobby pin it to his head and the horrified tennis diva to go all sweaty-palmed over whether his scalp pelt would go flying mid-match.

Yeah, I get that.

Let us not forget that I’m the one who, once I escaped from the barn I had accidentally locked myself in by climbing out of a window and falling precipitously to the ground, proceeded to casually brush myself off and stroll nonchalantly back to the house on the sheer chance that one of my neighbors just happened to be looking out towards my barn in the wee hours of New Years Day.

For most of my life, I was one of those people who didn’t start something until I felt I was totally and completely knowledgeable about the thing I wanted to try. And while it made my resume look good, it didn’t do much for my self-esteem. Because I did this out of fear. Fear of the consequences of not doing something “right” or “perfectly.” Fear of financial insecurity or insolvency. Fear of having to ask for help or even having to admit that I needed help. Fear of being vulnerable.

But now I’m trying to learn how to put my toe in the water just a bit, how to at least climb the tree even if I don’t go out on the limb. I’m trying to learn how to turn off the critical “image is everything” mindset and allow myself to have a few bad hair days. To be willing to correct my course if I find that I’m off the path.

John Kenneth Galbraith said, “If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error.”

I don’t know about you, but knowing that I can assure my immortal image just by making one spectacular error takes the sting out of giving new something a try.

Maybe the next time I say to myself, “Someday I’d like to do that,” I might be a bit more willing to Just Do It.

Have you been saying, “Someday” to your dreams?

Think about it!

Want to know more about how I managed to lock myself in the barn in the first place? Check out that my blog about that spectacularly stupid wake-up call.

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Hard Knocks

#ThoughtHealing Quote For The Week: “Don’t spend time beating on a wall, hoping to transform it into a door.” Coco Chanel

Are there times when you feel a little overwhelmed, but you can’t figure out how to separate the important stuff from the ordinary noise of your everyday life? Are you at a place in your life today where you can’t figure out how to get from where you are to where you want to be? Have you ever found yourself at a place where you honestly believed you had no way out of?

Well, let me tell you—I know exactly how you feel. I have to admit that I’ve found myself in a place with no obvious way out more than a few times in my life.

Like, for example, take the time I accidentally locked myself in a dark, empty barn 3 acres away from my nearest neighbor in the wee hours of the morning on New Years Day in 2005. No electricity, no water – and no cell phone because I wasn’t planning on staying down at the barn so it didn’t occur to me to bring it along.

Obviously, the fact that I’m writing this blog today means that I did find a way out. But I spent some time beating on the walls of that barn before I figured out that no amount of beating was going to transform the walls into my escape route.

Sounds like Coco Chanel might have locked herself in a barn once or twice herself, and she’s letting us know that, while we might have many options, not all of them are in our best interest.

Milton Berle said, “If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door."

From my 20 years as a business process engineer in the private and public sectors as well as what I learned from just this one spectacularly stupid, personal wake-up call on New Years Day, I now know that there is ALWAYS a way out if you are prepared to create it.

Are you wasting your time beating on walls? Or are you building the door to the life that is in your best and highest interest?

Think about it!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Be Willing To Be Willing

#ThoughtHealing Quote For The Week: “No matter how qualified or deserving we are, we will never reach a better life until we can imagine it for ourselves and allow ourselves to have it.” Richard Bach

For most of us, giving ourselves permission is challenging. For many reasons, we can’t or won’t allow ourselves to put ourselves first. Instead, we simply put one foot in front of the other and gut it out.

Part generational, part genetic, part upbringing, there are many reasons why we never consider what we might really want or what might be in our best and highest interest. We simply do what we think, or believe, we have to do. We jump into the hole, we see the steep walls, and then we don’t even acknowledge that there might be a way out, let alone cry out for help.

But giving ourselves permission to willingly consider alternatives is the key to reinvention. 

Willingness is a necessary precursor to taking action: you have to be willing to do something – or, at the very least, willing to try to do something – in order to keep moving forward.

I believe that when we give ourselves permission to rethink, to consider other possibilities, we crack open a door to our Higher Self – and our Higher Self, recognizing that the door has been cracked open, wedges a crowbar in to make sure that we consider a different way ahead.

In order to crack open that door to your Higher Self, you need to spend some time figuring out what it means to give yourself permission in terms of your own personal transformation and reinvention.

Once you can delve deeply into the concept of permission, you will be able to recognize the impact it can have, not only on your reinvention journey but on your entire life.

Think About It!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Which Way Did He Go?

Thought Healing Quote For The Week: “When you come to a fork in the road, take it.” Yogi Berra

The definition of a crossroads is “the place where roads intersect or a place at which a vital decision must be made.”

Clearly, Yogi Berra knew a thing or two about being at a crossroads. There are two significant elements of this definition that Yogi has managed to capture (and in a much funnier way than I ever could).

First, a crossroads involves options: this road or that road, this way or that, this direction or that.

Second, a crossroads implies that we are intended to select one of the options available to us: we turn left instead of right, we take the shady path rather than the sunny one, the uphill climb rather than the downhill stroll.

When we come to the fork in the road, we are supposed to take it.

Otherwise, we come to a standstill.

Have you ever found yourself standing at some imaginary starting line but you just couldn’t cross over it? Are you waiting for everything to fall into place? Are you afraid of change? What do you fear? Have you already decided that the worst will happen so you’re living your life accordingly?

Have you come to the fork in the road and don’t know which way to go?

It doesn’t matter which way you go. Just take the fork. What matters is that you’re starting down a new path. You can always correct your course along the way. Not only is taking that first step less difficult than you may imagine, but it may change your life in wonderful ways.

Think about it!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Everything Changes

#ThoughtHealing Quote For The Week: “Without accepting the fact that everything changes, we cannot find perfect composure. But unfortunately, although it is true, it is difficult for us to accept it. Because we cannot accept the truth of transience, we suffer.” Shunryu Suzuki

Whether it’s a change in your job, health, family, relationships, or life in general, transitions are an inevitable part of life.

Most people don’t like change. For many of us, change can be difficult or uncomfortable. This is true regardless of whether the change is forced upon us, planned, unexpected, or self-created. Why? Because we are giving up familiarity in exchange for the unfamiliar and unknown.

Some people certainly seem to handle change better than others. Most of us know at least one person who has successfully made a major change in their lives, like quitting smoking, losing weight, or walking away from their “Sure Thing” job.

Then there are the others – and maybe you count yourself among these people —who give up the minute it gets tough.

How would you rate your “change readiness.” Here are a few questions you can ask yourself:

·         How does the thought of change make me feel?

·         How do I feel, act, or respond when something changes in my life?

·         How would my friends and family describe my ability to handle change?

·         How do I feel, act, or respond when faced with the possibility of change or even thinking about initiating a change?

In The Second Neurotic's Notebook, published in 1966, Mignon McLaughlin said this about change: “It’s the most unhappy people who most fear change.”

Is your fear of change holding you back from happiness?

Think about it!

Interested in learning more about evaluating your change readiness and how it plays a role in your life? Check out my book, “Doing the Thing You Think You Cannot Do,” available on Amazon.

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Get Back To Where You Once Belonged

#ThoughtHealing Quote For The Week: “So you may have gotten into the habit of doubting the voice that was telling you quite clearly what was really going on. It is essential that you get it back.” Anne Lamott

I love the Internet. I love being able to find information on any topic from countless points of view and too-numerous-to-count perspectives. I can learn about anything that interests, provokes, amuses, or annoys me.

But as much as I love it, I can quickly become overwhelmed with the staggering volume of information – books, webinars, classes, seminars, newsletters, workshops, blogs – that is available to me, all of which is fascinating and compelling but also – well – overwhelming.

Plus, I can easily fall into another information trap: the assumption that the way to enlightenment requires not only exploring all of the tools but using them all as well in order to ensure I do something the “right” way.

But if we believe that enlightenment cannot be achieved without using all of the tools available, and, moreover, classes and workshops are the only means by which we learn to use these tools, then the tools become a trap. Which for most of us means that instead of trusting ourselves to know what is in our best and highest interest, we “passively wait and see.”

Don’t get me wrong. I’m all for asking for guidance when I need guidance. I sign up for classes, buy books, meet with my psychic mentor regularly. There are times when we need help from someone else who is further along the path, who has experience and wisdom and knowledge and tools that we need so that we may improve our own abilities in order to better assist, heal, and guide others. But, the starting point must be in our ability to recognize our OWN abilities, to trust our intuition, to carve out for ourselves the path through the wilderness that is our time here on Earth.

In his now-classic book, “What Color is Your Parachute,” Richard Nelson Bolles makes this observation: “Your heart knows the places that it loves. Your mind knows the subjects that it loves. Your body knows the workout that it loves. Your soul knows the values that it loves. Therefore, my friend, what a “dream job” is all about (beyond skills) is identifying these favorite geographies, defining for yourself the places that your skills, your soul, and your body, heart, and mind, most often yearn to be.”

Are you listening to the truest part of yourself? Do you know what your “favorite geographies” are? What speaks to the deepest part of your nature ?

Surely, the most credible vital facts are what we know at the soul level about ourselves. And I think we all know our truths, our own credible vital facts. We only need to listen to our own clear voice.

Think about it!

Interested more in discovering your own credible vital facts? Check out my blog: http://cracksinconsciousness.blogspot.com/2014/12/kiss-and-tell.html

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Vitameatavegamin

#ThoughtHealing Quote For The Week: “It’s a helluva start, being able to recognize what makes you happy.” Lucille Ball

Do you know what makes you happy? Or are you more familiar with what makes you unhappy rather than happy? Do you even know what “happy” means? What it feels like, or sounds like, or looks like?

There was a time that I didn’t. A therapist asked me whether I was happy, and I didn’t know how to answer the question. In fact, I had no frame of reference for what “happiness” even felt like. And, at the time, I actually didn’t even realize that we are supposed to feel happy, that it’s okay to feel happy, but that’s a thought healing topic for another day!

Most of us don’t even recognize that our lives are often filled with small, day-to-day occurrences that make us happy. Instead, we focus on the negative.

But when the going gets tough, the tough – do what? What do you do that always brings a smile to your face no matter what?

There are countless sources of information on the internet that can help you figure out what makes you happy. But the FIRST step is in recognizing that you DON’T recognize what makes you happy.

So get your helluva start right now!

And by the way, you might start by watching some of Lucille Ball’s now iconic comedy routines (think the chocolate conveyor belt or the “Vitameatavegamin” routine).

Think about it!

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

Skipping Stones

#ThoughtHealing Quote For The Week: “The pathway is smooth. Why do you throw rocks before you?” Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, Susan Jeffers

Are you a rock thrower? When you have a goal in mind, do you set off with purpose, moving ever forward, keeping up your momentum, and sticking resolutely to your goal? Or, do you focus on the reasons why you shouldn’t start? Do you find yourself creating obstacles to your success? Instead of just starting out, do you start to question whether you really need to achieve your goal?

I hate to admit it but I’ve tossed more than a few rocks into my smooth pathway.

Most of us have an Achilles heel of our own devising that keeps us from taking that first step towards achieving our goals. For us, then, the journey must be one of discovery and self-realization.

And the first step on this smooth pathway is paradoxically simple: You must start by exploring what it is that keeps you from getting started. Is it the fear of failure or, perhaps, the fear of success?

Visualize yourself getting started and then get in touch with what you’re feeling and thinking concerning this picture in your mind. Keep asking yourself, “What is underlying this?” Keep peeling the onion to reveal what lies beneath. Then try to discover what resources, emotions, or experiences you can draw upon to help you overcome the rocks you’ve thrown before you in your path. Most importantly, find out what it is that will keep you going – and make that happen!

Think about it!

Want to know more about setting and achieving goals? Read my blog, Ready–Aim–Aim–Aim: http://cracksinconsciousness.blogspot.com/2014/03/ready-aim-aim-aim.html

Want to know more about transforming limited thoughts and beliefs into limitless possibilities? Check out my Examine–Envision–Emerge Personal Transformation Book Series. Each book explores a particular aspect of thought healing. Find yours online at your favorite retailer today!

You Say Tomato, I Say Tomahto

#ThoughtHealing Quote For The Week: “The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you. We are in charge of our attitudes.” Charles Swindoll, Founder, Insight for Living

We all know that the three most important words in real estate are location, location, location. In learning to deal with change more effectively and without fear, the three most important words are attitude, attitude, attitude. You can change your perspective regarding any of the unforeseen, the expected, and the inevitable events that make up your life as well as how you feel about having to respond to the event. It’s your choice.

Take, for example, writing your own obituary rather than leaving that task for someone else to struggle with after you’re gone. You can approach your end-of-life preparations with dread. Or, you can see it as an opportunity to sing your own praises, to get your house in order, or to just know that you can do something as painful as thinking about your own or someone else’s mortality without being crushed by the knowledge.

You do have a choice regarding the attitude you will embrace for today. You cannot change the inevitable, the unexpected, or the unthinkable. But you CAN change how you deal with anything that might throw you off course or keep you from living the life that is in your best and highest interest.

Think about it!

Want to know more about the three simple steps you can take to prepare for, and then successfully cope with, the events that make up your life? Check out my book, “Doing the Thing You Think You Cannot Do: How to Prepare for all of the Unforeseen, Unexpected, and Inevitable Events That Life Can Throw at Us,” available online at your favorite retailer today!